Jay Mariotti is back!

So today I opened up the Tribune news online, and found out Mariotti is back writing for AOL Sports. Glad to see the voice of reason has returned. This is his first article, and here are the first 2 paragraphs of it:

We all have our career flashpoints. Mine came in China, perhaps triggered by a near-death experience while climbing the Great Wall. Or the horror of Bill Plaschke, my TV sparring partner, trying the local delicacy — animal penis — and concluding, “I guess I like penis; it’s very tasty.” Or maybe the sight of Richard M. Daley, mayor of a cold and corrupt Chicago, rushing toward me with a beer at a Beijing function to discuss … the White Sox?

Whatever, the surreal seeds were in place last August for a professional epiphany — one that has led me to America Online, where I’m thrilled to launch today as a national sports columnist, commentator and friendly neighborhood rabble-rouser. I should add I’m doubly thrilled to flee the darker corners of the newspaper business, which was reminding me of Marley the dog in his final days.

Mike Nadel is an idiot

So last week Mike Nadel went off on Erin Andrews choice of dress at a recent game she covered, starting off his article with this:

Erin Andrews, the ESPN “it” babe who clearly isn’t afraid to flaunt it, sauntered around the visiting clubhouse, flitting from one Cubs player to another. Her skimpy outfit — designed to accentuate her, um, positives — had players leering at her. Some made lewd comments under their breath. Others giggled like 12-year-olds.

After reading this, I thought Erin Andrews was scantly clad at the game. However, after seeing a photo of her wardrobe, I knew Nadel was wasting paper and ink. This is what she wore

I don’t think anyone should be offended by her wardrobe. Maybe on a hot steamy evening, she didn’t want to wear a sweater and dress pants. After all, Erin Andrews fills 2 holes in 1 for ESPN. She provides the eye candy for ESPN’s biggest audience, young males such as myself, and she is an excellent reporter who knows her stuff. Her boss agrees, saying,

“Erin is a tremendous reporter. She’s a prepared, hard-working journalist who is well-respected and asks excellent questions,” ESPN news executive Norby Williamson said in a statement. “We’re proud to have her as an important part of our coverage team. Beyond that, we feel it’s unnecessary to even respond to any of the specifics outlined (by Nadel).”

Further, Nadel needs to get his facts straight too, regarding Andrews’ actions:

Still, the Brewers’ claims of being unaffected by this series’ results were as unbelievable as Erin Andrews’ work clothes. “Good for you, Rammie,” Andrews said three hours before the game, bending forward to shake Aramis Ramirez’s hand. “Good for you.”

Ramirez, who had three doubles in the Cubs’ 7-1 victory the previous night, sheepishly accepted Andrews’ congratulations. She didn’t ask him any questions because he was sitting on the players-only sofa; she seemingly just wanted to show “Rammie” her support. Weird.

Moments later, the blonde reporter was chatting with Alfonso Soriano. At one point, she placed her hand suggestively on Soriano’s left bicep.

“Hey, hey, hey! Look at this!” [Cubs Manager Lou] Piniella said, loudly and excitedly. “Are you doing a baseball game today or a modeling assignment?”

This is what Andrews said to that:

*On Lou Piniella’s comment: “That did happen. But my stance is that people can say what they want. Lou Piniella looks at me like a daughter. If it was the first time I had met him, that would be one thing.”

*On Ramirez, Andrews said she walked over to the players-only area where Ramirez was sitting because pitcher Ryan Dempster called her over to show her pictures of his son from the All-Star game. She said she was not aware his nickname was “Rammie” and said she did not call him that.

*On Soriano, Andrews said she touched his hand, not his bicep, and was trying to gauge where the bone was that he broke earlier this year.

And apparently, Nadel didn’t even talk to her about the article, as Andrews said

“I think my overall reaction is that it’s really sad that in 2008 … I have people watching every single move I make. When there’s a big game between the Cubs and Brewers going on, it’s sad that that’s what their focus is on. … And the last thing I had heard is that when you want to do a story on someone, you contact them.”

Way to bring the heat, Erin. The real unprofessional person here is Mike Nadel. I seem to have forgotten that this blog is about blasting the truth and asking the hard questions, so here I go: First off, why didn’t Nadel talk with Erin before writing the article. Second, why was Erin Andrews wardrobe the focus of the article to begin with? Third, why did Nadel write things that were not true, such as suggestively touching Soriano bicep and congratulating Ramirez? Someone ought to blast Mike Nadel and his unprofessional ways

Beckham comes to ESPN on July 21. We don’t care

Memo to ESPN: We don’t give a fuck about Beckham. So what if he’s coming to ESPN on July 21? Look at your front page polls. 55% of the people don’t give a shit. Is it really a surprise? People here don’t care for soccer to begin with. What makes you think we’ll watch if Beckham comes? All the ESPN broadcasters are stupid and don’t know anything about soccer. The only one who knows anything is that dorky looking British guy with the annoying accent. Soccer is only good to watch in Spanish, where the broadcasters don’t piss you off, and they actually entertain. GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!!!!

As Jim Rome said, “Soccer is not a sport, it’s a reason to riot.” We don’t care, ESPN

Soccer, Hockey, NASCAR, T.O., A-Rod: KEEP OFF ESPN!!

WILL ESPN EVER LEARN!!!! SHUT UP ABOUT SOCCER, HOCKEY, NASCAR, T.O., A-ROD, YANKEES, RED SOX, KNICKS, DUKE, UNC, ARTEST. WE DON’T CARE!! We don’t want to hear stories about T.O. We know he’s a jerk. We don’t want to hear about A-Rod. We know he can’t perform in the clutch and deal with the New York media. We’re tired of hearing the Yankees, Red Sox, Duke, UNC, and Knicks all the time. We don’t care about Artest. We know he has problems. Not many people care for soccer, hockey, or NASCAR, and no one on ESPN knows anything about them. Tim Cowlishaw is the only one I see who knows anything about hockey and NASCAR, and he’s an idiot!! No one on ESPN knows anything about soccer, so they should just shut up. Besides, not many people care about soccer. So stop wasting people’s time and put some better stuff on. How about some love for teams in the midwest and the west?

Chicago will not get the 2016 Olympics. Feel free to thank Bush

A couple of months ago, Chicago was awarded the USOC’s bid to get the 2016 Olympics. However, the IOC will not select them. And the culprit will be the 43rd President of the United States of America, George Walker Bush. I say this because of the way Bush handled the World Baseball Classic. He refused to allow Cuba to participate, because of the trade embargo with Cuba, as Cuba would be making money off the WBC on U.S. soil. To ensure that they would not make any money off the WBC, Cuba said they would donate their cut to Katrina victims.

After the tournament ended, the U.S. said Cuba could not donate their cut. They didn’t even give it to MLB or donate it themselves to the relief effort. They took it for themselves. Perhaps Castro was right that the U.S. was afraid to play Cuba, as Cuba advanced further than the U.S. First of all, the regime would not be making money, the players would be. This money that players rightfully earned was taken from them and kept by the greedy U.S. government for themselves.

After this whole fiasco, will the IOC really want to give America another Olympics? I sure don’t. How do we know if they’re gonna be assholes in dealing with Cuba again? Just because world competition is on U.S. soil, our government thinks they apply the trade embargo to Cuba.

Don’t tell me it’s because the Cubans are commies. Because the Chinese are commies and we do business with them. They treat their people worse than the Cubans. It’s because of a personal vendetta with Castro. 638 miserably failed attempts to kill him, yet our vice president and Bobby Knight are weapons of ass destruction.

Also, with the CTA, Chicago does not have a good public transit system. The CTA SUCKS!! Service is terrible, full of delays, the trains are slow, the workers are assholes, and drunk bastards are always on the train.

Furthermore, the rest of the world hates America. Do you think they will want this country who’s government is full of assholes running the show?? I sure don’t.

On the flip side however, Team America has embarrassed themselves on the world stage for a while now. The NBA has turned into a bunch of thugs who have no respect for the game. They laid a dud in 2004, and again at the World Championships in 2006. If they lay a dud in the tournament of the Americas this summer, they might not even make the Olympics. See how America played at the 2006 WBC. As I said earlier, our team loaded with major leaguers lost in the 2nd round, while Cuba, a team with no major leaguers, made it to the title game, losing to Japan, a team with then only 2 major leaguers, Ichiro and Otsuka.

Due to America’s dominance in softball, it won’t be an Olympic sport in 2012. I personally agree with this, as the games are boring as hell. It should stay off the table for good. Baseball is also off, but America sucks at it, not even making the 2004 Olympics, and getting thoroughly trashed in the WBC.

Soccer will never be cut from the Olympics, so America will get plenty of chances to embarrass themselves. The men’s team has never been able to compete with the powerful European teams or Brazil. With the retirement of Mia Hamm, will the women’s team be able to continue their world domination?? That remains to be seen. If Chicago were to get the 2016 games, Team America would just embarrass themselves on the world stage in their own backyard, showing the true colors of the major sports with world tournaments: Basketball, soccer, and baseball.

I personally don’t care for Team America that much in world tournaments. Basketball, I usually root for whatever teams have Bulls on them, or I root for Team Canada when Steve Nash plays, or Team Germany when Dirk plays. Baseball, I root for Venezuela, as Big Z and the Great Johan (2 of my favorite MLB players) hail from Venezuela. If there are Cubs I like on Team America, I do root for them, but GO VENEZUELA!!

All y’all can think in your little fantasy bubble that we’ll get the 2016 games, but when the IOC shafts us, be sure to thank Bush for the miserable failure. ABAJO BUSH!!

Sports broadcasters who need to be punched in the face

The following sports broadcasters are idiots and/or very annoying and need to be punched in the face:

Joe Buck
Tim McCarver
Joe Morgan
Mike North
Mike Breen
Ken “The Hawk” Harrelson
“DJ” Darren Jackson”
Brent Mussburger
“Boomer” Chris Berman
Sean Salisbury
Tim Cowlishaw
Bill Plashke
Tony Kornheiser
Dick Vitale

Will ESPN SHUT UP ABOUT BECKHAM!!

Memo to ESPN: SHUT UP ABOUT DAVID ROBERT JOSEPH BECKHAM!! We don’t give a dam about him, okay. He’s not here to kick the rock in America. He’s here to generate a media buzz, with him and Posh Spice all over Hollywood. No one in this country gives a dam about soccer. I’m sick of turning on ESPN and seeing stories about him. I DON’T CARE OKAY!! Geez, listening to Cowlishaw talk about hockey, NASCAR and the BCS would be better than Beckham. ESPN knows nothing about soccer. They are morons. They should stick to what their name stands for, East coaSt PuNks. Their World Cup coverage was horrible. The only guy who seemed to know what he was talking about was an annoying British guy with a horrible accent. I only watched the World Cup when there was no SportsCenter or baseball. I would much rather watch SportsCenter or baseball than soccer. And when I would turn on my idiot box to the World Cup on ESPN, I would watch it in spanish. Their broadcasters don’t anger me, even though GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!! is the only world in their vocabulary. ESPN should just shut up. They know nothing about soccer.